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I’m nervous my boyfriend’s use of AI is affecting his means to suppose for himself | Household

greater by greater
February 22, 2026
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I’m nervous my boyfriend’s use of AI is affecting his means to suppose for himself | Household


My boyfriend of eight years, who’s 44, has ADHD and runs his personal enterprise. He’s at all times struggled with admin and mundane duties, however AI has revolutionised how he works. Now I’m nervous he can’t appear to do something with out AI. He’s a heavy ChatGPT person and makes use of it even when there’s a greater non-AI different (eg he’ll ask it for practice instances somewhat than utilizing Trainline, although it’s much less correct). He simply obtained his ChatGPT Wrapped and he’s within the prime 0.3% of customers worldwide.

I fear about his means to suppose independently, in addition to the environmental affect. I do know it’s a great tool for him at work, however he makes use of it for every little thing in life.

I’m very conscious I can come throughout as fairly naggy, and his ADHD could make him obsessive. I’d love some recommendation on the best way to strategy this with him .

Working a enterprise might be anxious, and though your boyfriend’s ADHD could also be an element, I ponder if he’s anxious anyway and if his use of AI is a symptom somewhat than the trigger.

I took your letter to guide scientific psychologist and psychoanalyst Dr Stephen Blumenthal and Henry Shelford, CEO of ADHD UK.

Blumenthal puzzled if we’re “on the verge of a brand new diagnostic class of ‘chatbot overdependence syndrome’ as we head into an age wherein we develop into more and more reliant on AI. When used judiciously, AI aids us, but it surely might have disastrous penalties if we develop into depending on it and lose the capability for odd functioning.

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AI can take you down a rabbit gap, however it could actually additionally help you and assist you construction your ideas, schedule stuff and get issues executed

“Somebody with ADHD has a shorter consideration span, issue focusing and a lowered capability to plan and suppose forward, so AI is an ideal match, which is why it may be so useful. The draw back is that there’s a better propensity to develop into overdependent on it.”

Shelford puzzled in case your boyfriend was struggling anyway, and if the AI supplied a helpful “flotation support”? “AI can take you down a rabbit gap,” he stated, “however it could actually additionally help you and assist you construction your ideas, schedule stuff and get issues executed.”

Your boyfriend’s use of AI appears to transcend this. It’s as if he’s doubting himself, and that may be pernicious.

Blumenthal says: “Issues come up when your use of AI goes past satisfying the issue you want to resolve. It feels as if a relationship with it has began to develop, and also you imbue it with human qualities, a projection of our personal needs and wishes for validation and care.”

What to do? You’re proper to not nag, which not often solves something, as a result of it simply turns into noise. As with all tender and troublesome conversations, choose your second whenever you’re each calm.

Shelford advisable asking your boyfriend, “‘What are you getting out of it? Why is that this software such an enormous deal and what are the gaps it’s filling?’ Then look to see if there are higher options or higher methods to make use of it.”

Blumenthal thought: “as with all overdependence syndrome, there first must be recognition that there’s a drawback. It’s straightforward to develop into crucial of the one who’s struggling, however that’s solely prone to trigger them to withdraw additional into dependency. The case should be made compassionately, recognising that being with out the scaffold of ChatGPT most likely seems like a risk.”

The excellent news is that, not like the era now rising up with AI, your boyfriend has a monitor report of functioning properly with out it. Hopefully he might be reminded of that and discover a place the place AI augments the talents he already has. However apparently he’s anxious and I feel the trigger must be discovered so you possibly can each transfer ahead.

Each week, Annalisa Barbieri addresses a private drawback despatched in by a reader. If you want recommendation from Annalisa, please ship your drawback to [email protected]. Annalisa regrets she can’t enter into private correspondence. Submissions are topic to our phrases and circumstances. The most recent sequence of Annalisa’s podcast is obtainable right here.

Feedback on this piece are pre-moderated to make sure the dialogue stays on the matters raised by the article. Please bear in mind that there could also be a brief delay in feedback showing on the positioning.

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